The Dangerous Rise of “Domesticated” Men
In a Nutshell
Modern society unfairly demands greater emotional containment and behavioral modification from men, who are genetically less domesticated and more aggressive/impulsive than women, forcing many to "white-knuckle" suppression of natural traits to fit a feminized world. Schooling exacerbates this by expecting developmentally immature boys to match girls, as critiqued via Richard Reeves' red-shirting idea and Rawls' veil of ignorance—better designs would allow equal thriving amid sex differences in ADHD, conduct disorders, and brain development. Avoid zero-sum gender grievances; recognize men's unseen costs alongside women's (e.g., double shift) to build a society valuing everyone, per the Norwegian crime paradox.
These notes were generated by AI and may contain inaccuracies.
Is the mainstream push to dissuade men from aggression, dominance, and impulsivity genetically unfair? Men are on average less domesticated and less appropriate for a gentle modern world, requiring more behavioral modification than women.
Richard Reeves argues that if schools won't change, red-shirt all boys by giving them an extra year because expecting a five-year-old boy to perform developmentally the same as a five-year-old girl is unfair.
Influenced by political philosopher John Rawls' thought experiment: If you didn't know the hand you'd be dealt in the natural or social lottery, what societal rules would you want? Would you design current schooling without knowing if you'd be a man or woman? Given sex differences in brain development, ADHD rates, and conduct disorder rates, the speaker would design an educational system for equal opportunity for sons and daughters to thrive, which current systems fail to do.
Son in middle school; culturally insane to confine 12-13-year-old pubertal boys indoors all day, sitting still with peers only, no older boys, no younger kids, no responsibilities, under a 25-year-old woman. Contrast with monthly "Earth native day": play in woods, build fires, carve wood, catch turtles, fish, hide in bushes, discuss math and stars while reading preparation.
Men require more emotional containment and discipline to fit a domesticated modern world, farther from their predisposition than women. This takes more effort. Society has feminized, selecting for feminine traits like higher conscientiousness, orderliness, lower risk-taking, aggression, dominance. Men pay an additional price; compares to women's "double shift" but men's unseen emotional containment given their nature should be recognized.
Distributions of traits like conscientiousness, agreeableness, risk-taking highly overlap; most men in normal women's range and vice versa. Sex differences most evident at extremes. When combining multiple correlated traits (aggression, externalizing behavior, impulsivity, risk-taking, dominance), men more likely at outlying extremes; almost no women as risk-taking, aggressive, dominant at those levels. Even in multi-dimensional trait space, men and women more similar than assumed, but extremes differ.
Many men "white-knuckling" through life, suppressing natural impulses because modern society forbids them; a price (effort, denial of nature, containment) women don't pay equivalently.
Speaker acknowledges women's unseen costs like double shift and domestic labor. Men seek equivalent grievance recognition. Young men (e.g., 18-year-old college students) struggle to articulate societal role, value, purpose; feel headwinds, lost lane. Gap between young men and women in perceptions of society, politics, hope, trust is sad and alarming. Data poor at countering vibes of unfairness.
Society fracturing into zero-sum: women gaining means men losing (against their nature), or men's issues unfair to women. Better: Norwegian crime paradox perspective—everyone has value, all in same boat; make society work for everyone rather than adjudicate unfairness claims.
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